


Divine

by HomesickAlien



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-13
Updated: 2018-05-13
Packaged: 2019-05-05 23:32:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14629344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HomesickAlien/pseuds/HomesickAlien
Summary: love could be a thought that clouds your brain





	Divine

**Author's Note:**

> im working on actually serious fics i swear ive just been a lil bummed and needed some "less gay struggles more gay snuggles" fics ya know what i mean

Nito’s not really sure what he expected Shuu to taste like.

Maybe, in his mind, it would taste like something divine, because Shuu always presents himself in such a manner that treads the line between Heaven and Earth. Or maybe, it was something sweet like candy, because aside from his usual bland taste in food he’s oft under the influence of Kagehira, who’s tastes are equally unbalanced. And together, it does sort of have that flavor, of something bubbly as coca-cola mixed with a little bit of every other drink in the fountain, and it doesn’t seem quite right but it seems exactly as it should be, for Shuu Itsuki. 

He’s so shy, even when he had once accused Nito of such, Nito’s certain he’d never been so introverted to shut his eyes so tight for a kiss. He can see lines forming across his scrunched up eyes, furrowed brows -- for someone who refers to Nito so endearingly to look so precious shouldn’t be such an odd thing, but it strikes Nito at his core. How precious a person Shuu truly is to him, he’s grateful Shuu’s eyes are shut, so he can relish in this moment silently with a soft smile painted over his lips.

It doesn’t really feel like a kiss. It’s light as a feather but feels like the weight of the world on his shoulders. He’s not sure if it’s a first for Shuu, but it certainly feels like one. He feels more embarrassed for his partner than his own self, he can feel the sweat of Shuu’s palms over his hands, Shuu holds onto him for balance but it seems even the wind could knock him over at any time. He’s that kind of sensitive and sincere boy, somehow even just a little kiss feels immoral with a boy as kindhearted as Shuu. 

It’s not really innocence, though, or shyness, but the love itself he holds for Nito that’s so genuinely pure. It’s an odd kind of love, one that hadn’t ever been romantic or sexual in nature, but like art. Like soul mates, is how Shuu had likened it, but Nito lives a much simpler life than Shuu. 

And right now, they’re no longer partners, after all. They’re as good as strangers, really. They can barely hold a conversation, but there’s something about the passions of firsts, that their flames never seem to burn out no matter how much time passes. The feeling’s always the same, awkward and clumsy as it’s always, always been. But now, Nito thinks, he wouldn’t really want it any other way.

“Itsuki…” Nito speaks softly, precisely, like he were speaking to a small animal on the side of the road, “You’re so stiff…”

It takes a moment, but Shuu finally does open his eyes as he pulls his face a few centimeters away from Nito’s. It takes a few more moments for reality to settle back in, and the world to start turning again, and for Shuu’s face to heat up to a hundred-and-two. Nito laughs with such audacity, as though nothing at all phases him, but he’s just as nervous. It’s subtle, but Shuu can feel the shaking of Nito’s fingertips when he runs them through his hair, in a feeble attempt to calm Shuu down. It only seems to make them both more awkward than they were five minutes prior, when the concept of kissing at all had been brought to the door.

“Sorry…” Shuu says, almost indecisively, and so out of character for him.

“What are you apologizing for?” Nito smiles, “This is good.”

“It is…?”

_Mmhmm_ , Nito hums, “It’s perfect.”

They stare into eachothers eyes emptily, without anything more to say despite having such a backlog of confessions to make. It seems they’re constantly skipping over that part of the relationship -- the talking. The conversations.

Whenever they make an attempt, it’s always going awry. They already know everything about one another’s heart, it’s a waste of time to speak about the things that are already second nature. Despite that, they both require a bit too much consolation, always treating a touch of skin like that of dropping fragile glass, feeling like every moment together things might fall apart again. It’s a difficult dance to perform, but it doesn’t feel quite so suffocating these days.

Nito’s not a doll behind glass doors, anymore. He has a heart and a will, he can breath and speak his mind as much as he likes. But sometimes it still feels like Shuu doesn’t get the concept of being human much more than Nito’s come to understand it over the last few years. They’re the same stupid children they’d left one another as on graduation day, but with every mistake they’ve learned something new. Failure doesn’t feel so damning, when they get to share it together.

Nito pulls at Shuu’s arm, holding him close to his heart just to remind them both they’re alive. He can feel the love beating beneath his ribs like the melody of a song, one that’s eternal in life and in death. It’s a special kind of endless fantasy, better than any show he could conjure up, is his love for Nito. His love for the real Nito, the shameless human who’d do something so embarrassing like this, calling it perfect as though they aren’t both stumbling through their first kiss. It’s so pathetic he might die in peace right here and now. 

“Itsuki,” Nito says, killing the long drawn silence filled only by the buzzing of their ears, “Will you sing with me?”

“Sing? What song would you like to sing?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Nito sighs, the warmth of his breath making marks on Shuu’s neck. He turns his head to rest more comfortably on Shuu’s shoulder. “I just wanted to hear your voice. It’s been a while, you know?”

“Maybe we could write a song together to sing. Wouldn’t that be nostalgic?”

“A song for just the two of us, huh…”

Nito muses, the memories of their time together as partners pours down like a short rain storm in the summer. If memories are like a storm, this moment is like the rainbow thereafter. It’s not as though every day were Hell back in those days, in fact, it’s only in hindsight he can remember all the positives from their childhood. All of the firsts.

Their first show, that had been a mess wrought from inexperience and art fueled with passion. Their first studio recording, their first interviews, their first matching outfits, those kinds of  _ firsts  _ seems so endless when he reflects on them. They didn’t seem so exciting back then, but right now his heart is beating about as fast as the end of their first performance as Valkyrie. The moment that had forever solidified their partnership, now feels so distant, but the songs they’d wrote together share the sentiments of their love for being idols, however short lived it was.

“Valkyrie songs are as stiff as you are.” Nito says, sitting up proper, pushing Shuu up with him, “If we ever performed together again, I’d want to sing a happy song. Something you’d have to smile while performing.”

“That sounds like you just miss being on stage with your kids.”

“I do!” Nito says, almost defensively, “Sometimes, I do.”

“Have our aesthetics always been so incompatible?”

Shuu laughs, ruffling Nito’s hair. He doesn’t expect an answer, but Nito fumbles out some words in response that never quite form a sentence to defend himself with. Valkyrie is the antithesis of Ra*bits, and Nito’s no longer such a good actor that he’d like to perform both. Rather, Ra*bits feels like it were born of his trueself, whatever were left of it in his third year, it were a special kind of spark that could never be replicated.

But, if he were allowed to dream, some kind of combination of the two would be perfect to him. The combination of such pure happiness and ambiance, like the hymns he used to mindlessly sing along to without giving way to their meaning. 

“Well, it doesn’t really matter…”

Nito says, twining his hand with Shuu’s again, pushing himself up with his knee to press a second kiss to Shuu’s lips. The second is far better than the first, because it’s such a surprise there isn't a second to think about it. And in a second it’s over, but Nito doesn’t give Shuu the opportunity to process that long enough to feel embarrassed by it. He touches Shuu’s lips with his free hand, moving gently as a wave over his cheeks and then to his hair, combing it behind his ear. Nothing seems to go the way it should. Without any further commentary, Nito presses their lips together again, falling right back into Shuu’s arms, humming whatever melody pops into his mind at the time. It doesn’t sound anything like a song anyone were meant to hear, it sounds special and precious and confined to this very moment alone. A custom made soundtrack to the rest of their lives, meaningless and incomprehensible as love itself.

It’s so simple and so ephemeral. He isn’t thinking about the taste of it any longer, or the sight of Shuu’s face or the smell of the room or the sound of his heart pounding in his ears. None of those sensations matter at all, just the touch, the sensation of melting into one another in love with the moment rather than the memory it will leave behind. It’s as fragile as glass being knocked off a high-strung table, but even now it hasn’t yet broken. 

It seems it’s only just begun to come together, really. 

**Author's Note:**

> thanks comment blah blah blah


End file.
